Today I have news that might be shocking to you: it’s time to turn off the vibrator.
Using vibrators to self-pleasure might seem like the easiest, quickest way to reach the big O, but there are a few very important reasons why it’s not doing your entire body justice.
To help explain why, it’s important to know the 4 stages of sexual response, as originally outlined by scientists Masters & Johnson in the 1960s. You might also recognize them from Chapter 8 of my book, WomanCode: Initial Arousal: the excitement phase, lasting anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours. Sex organs become engorged with blood and glands in the vaginal walls secrete lubricating liquid to make you feel wet.
Plateau: a continuation of arousal, when tissues swell and breathing, heart rate, and blood pressure continue to rise. You may even make a moaning sound at this point.
Orgasm: vaginal lubrication increases, muscles in the vaginal wall constrict, and overall pleasure increases. If you climax (which is not always a given), you’ll experience quick cycles of contractions in your pelvic floor muscles.
Resolution: After climax, your muscles relax and your body releases from its aroused state.
When you use a vibrator, you’re skipping a large part of the Plateau stage and moving right into climax. This means you’re also missing out on some of the most hormonally-healthy, natural chemicals your body produces during this Plateau phase! For instance, one of these chemicals, nitric oxide, is what Viagra is manufactured from. The more you can generate it naturally, the more you’ll experience its anti-aging benefits, increased sexual response, as well as adrenal health which you’ll read more about below.
Especially if you’re working on your fertility, trying to get your sex drive back, or managing your periods, having a bigger Orgasmic Plateau phase is the way to help.
Here are 3 ways vibrators impact you:
1. You miss the benefits of nitric oxide and oxytocin. Using a vibrator forces your body to bypass a large part of the Plateau and Orgasm phases, which cuts down on your exposure to oxytocin and nitric oxide. These natural chemicals provide you with better immunity, improved cervical mucus, and regular ovulation patterns.
2. You limit your orgasmic potential. Quick vibrator-induced orgasms lengthen what we call the refractory period between orgasms. This means the sensitive nerve endings get fried by the strong vibrations, so you have to wait longer until you’re ready again for your next orgasm. Essentially, this means you can only have one orgasm at a time, maybe two if you’re lucky. Bummer.
3. You deprive your body of the stress-reducing benefits. The bigger and better the orgasm you experience, the more cortisol gets flushed out of your system. Cortisol, if you don’t remember, is one of our body’s main stress hormones that contributes to adrenal burnout, blood sugar whackiness and that extra layer of belly fat that doesn’t seem to go away.
When you skip the orgasmic plateau, you lose out on the stress-relieving, waist-slimming benefits of sex!
“So what do I do without my vibrator, Alisa?” So glad you asked!
First of all, be sure you’re setting aside at least 20 minutes for your self-pleasuring sessions. This might seem like a lot, so make sure you’re getting into bed a little bit earlier or doing what you need to do to make it possible.
Next, be sure to use lubricant - Aloe Cadabra is the only one I use and recommend. When you’re using your hands to get the party started, you’ll need to be lubricated. I think you’ll be amazed at what happens to your orgasmic experience when you go au natural.
